You've been in a relationship for years. Maybe you're even married. And out of nowhere, you're crushing on your co-worker, your friend or even your neighbor. The shock! The horror!
Actually, don't stress at all. Just because you're not a teenager anymore doesn't mean you're not entitled to a crush or three. Crushes are totally normal.
"People are appealing, and attraction is never limited to the person we are with," said Sherrie Campbell, a Los Angeles-based psychologist and author of "But It's Your Family." However, she added, "we can all look at the menu and not order: It's only bad if we are unhappy in our relationship and we veer from it with a crush and lose our integrity."
Caroline Wilkerson, 36, an acupuncturist in Chicago, said she's always had crushes, with one in particular that affected her strongly during her marriage. He was a co-worker, and they joked around, chatted and connected on many levels. But she knew that she needed to keep the relationship on crush level.
"What you feed grows," she said.
So she told her husband about her workplace crush, they talked about it, and her feelings toward her co-worker dissipated.
"What you do about it is what's important," Wilkerson said. "If you continue to try to be around that person and to feed your fantasies, it has way more potential to become a real thing. But especially if the feeling is obviously mutual, there's nothing wrong with harmless flirting here and there as long as you're mature about it and you address it."
Even science says so.