Dear Amy: My wife and I are both retired Asian-American professionals. Several months ago, a homeless person in an outdoor market came up to my wife and spit hot coffee in her face.
My wife called the police, and they identified the man. He was not arrested, even though he has a record of inappropriate public activity and harassment. He also is mentally imbalanced.
Now my wife is afraid to go out in public without me. I need to find a way to have her feel safe without arming her.
Also, I'm concerned that if this mentally ill person attacks us, I will harm this mentally ill person, and I would be the one who sent to jail.
Amy says: The history of hate crimes against Asian Americans is heartbreaking. A recent survey suggested that up to one in six Asians have been targets of hate crimes, representing a dramatic rise in attacks during the pandemic.
I believe that the answer — to your safety and to your sense of well-being — lies in solidarity, activism and empowerment.
The COVID-19 Hate Crimes Act, passed last year, aims to empower communities to fight anti-Asian hate crimes. The organization Stop AAPI Hate (stopaapihate.org) has safety tips on its website. The Asian Mental Health Collective (Asianmhc.org) has a database of therapists who might work with your wife.
I also suggest contacting your local community center and seeing if there are self-defense classes or other groups your wife could join to experience community and solidarity. I also suggest that you do your best to advocate with the police as to what they are doing to assist your community.
