Ask Amy: Love is better than a Lyft

Dear Amy: My nephew recently refused to pick up his 77-year-old mother from the airport. "Besides," he said, "It's easier to get a taxi, Uber or Lyft." To that remark, I say: "Easier for whom?"

Visiting your loved ones means packing, schlepping, going through security, plus crowds and possible delays — not to mention the expense. So, is it too much to expect that the person you're going to visit drive to the airport to pick you up?

After an arduous journey, seeing a familiar, loving face and then getting a big hug means your journey is over. But climbing into even the nicest hired car means you're still traveling — sitting in the back of a car, alone, on one more leg of your journey.

Nowadays it's common to outsource everything. Let's not outsource love and compassion.

Amy says: Picking someone up (or taking them to) the airport shows that you care. A lot.

I'm reminded of those wonderful opening and closing scenes in the movie "Love Actually," consisting of an extended montage of people greeting one another at an airport terminal —and hugging their hearts out.

Dude: Meet your mom at the airport! It's a beautiful act of love.

Dear Amy: I've been dating a woman for almost six years. The problem is that she calls her husband several times a day. They're separated, but not divorced. She says it is about the kids (who are all grown).

She has told a few people in her family that we are together, but she refuses to tell her husband because she still has stuff at the house and she's afraid of him either breaking her stuff or not letting her have her possessions.

We live together, but she tells everyone that we are roommates.

Am I wasting my time? I love her, and I believe that she loves me. I think she's just afraid of change, and she's keeping him on the hook in case we break up.

What do you think I should do?

Amy says: Let's assume that you are correct about everything you state: Your partner is still attached to her husband, afraid of change, lying about your relationship and keeping her husband on the hook.

Is this what you want?

Imagine if a friend of yours described their own relationship in this way: "She's married and still closely involved with her husband. She and I live together, but we're on the down low, so we need to keep it a secret."

Would you describe this as a healthy way to live? Would you want your friend to be in a relationship that seemed to have no future? I doubt it.

So yes, you are wasting your time. It's time for you to be your own best friend, and to move forward with the authentic life you want to lead.

Send questions to Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com.