More than 20 years ago, Pamela Gail Johnson — a life and leadership coach — began digging into a question that was gnawing at her: Why are people largely so unhappy? She fully understood why people facing the devastating loss of a loved one or their home or their livelihood would be unhappy. But why were those who seemed to be largely unscathed miserable, too?
Johnson, who started her career working in the mental health and substance abuse field at Hazelden Foundation, founded the Society of Happy People in 1998. The now global organization celebrates three "happiness holidays," including Happiness Happens Month (it's August, so listen up!). Johnson lives in Dallas and is the author of the upcoming "Practical Happiness: Four Principles to Improve Your Life."
Q: Your research concludes that humans are wired to be unhappy. Why do you think that is?
A: Our brains are hardwired to quickly recognize and help us get away from things that can hurt us. This goes back to our caveman days, when we had to protect ourselves from gigantic, hairy, scary creatures and such. Our brains evolved to help us recognize danger and keep us safe. That's why it's always easier, and maybe even more natural, for us to see what's wrong before we can see what's right.
Q: So it's harder, naturally, to be happy?
A: Having a positive outlook usually requires a conscious effort until it becomes a habit or our go-to mind-set. Happiness is not the absence of problems or difficulties. You may have to train yourself to be a little happier.
Q: Can we point to the pandemic as the beginning of the plunge into malaise?
A: Part of it can be attributed to COVID, but this American trend of unhappiness started before COVID. We already were stressed, angry, anxious. So many people want to say that happiness is about materialism, and it's not. I really think we've moved to this place of focusing on things that separate us, to recognize more what's wrong than what's right.