“Soccer moms are the enemy of natural history and the full development of a child.” — E.O. Wilson
Some years back, in January 1988, just after 3 a.m., I was in a Louisiana marsh. Three federal wildlife agents and I had just paddled two pirogues — a type of canoe — into a tall spit of cane, where we would wait for a few hours, slapping mosquitoes and chiggers.
Keeping an eye out for water moccasins, we passed the time bantering darkly about just who was getting paid less for this stakeout, a trio of civil servants or a two-bit outdoors writer.
The day before, the agents had spotted corn spread in the marsh surrounding a nearby duck blind. Our intent was to wait about three hours until the hunters who had illegally “baited” the area showed up and — equally illegally — killed the wigeon, gadwall, teal and other ducks that, having foregone their natural wariness, would dive bomb the blind to eat the corn.
And get shot.
One of the agents, Dave Hall, was passionate not only about catching bad guys but converting them to legal hunters and proactive conservationists. He had developed a program called “Poachers to Preachers,” in which convicted wildlife violators were required to appear at community gatherings to confess to their crimes not only against waterfowl, but against legal hunters, resource conservation and society at large.
That morning, as the eastern sky brightened, an airboat carrying four men descended on the blind. As it did, Hall whispered to me, “I know one of them.” Shortly thereafter, ducks flew and the shooting began, continuing for about an hour before the agents and I paddled into an opening near the blind.
“U.S. Fish and Wildlife agents!” Hall and the others shouted, holding their badges aloft.