Without pass blocking, Vikings look inept against Cowboys

On the Vikings' first theoretical pass play of the game, Kirk Cousins dropped back, dropped to the ground and dropped the ball. Cowboys star Micah Parsons circumnavigated left tackle Christian Darrisaw like a snowmobile around a tree stump, caught Cousins from behind and created a trailer for the upcoming series of events that would give Dallas a 40-3 victory over the previously esteemed Vikings.

The worst Vikings loss ever to occur within the Minneapolis city limits was also their most embarrassing loss to an NFC East team since their infamous 41-0 surrender to the New York Giants in the 2000 NFC title game.

That became known as "41-donut." Sunday, the Vikings curated a nothing burger. It was rare and rancid.

Dallas — that other team no one can trust — destroyed the team with the second-best record in the NFL by overwhelming an offensive line that, until Sunday, had been good enough often enough.

Before Sunday, Cousins had never been sacked seven times in one NFL game. Dallas earned six of those sacks with a four-man rush, meaning there can be no excuses about schemes or disguises. The Vikings offensive line got shoved, and didn't shove back.

After recent victories, Cousins has worn his teammates' jewelry. Sunday, he needed to borrow their Icy Hot.

When a team loses by 37, more than one thing went wrong, but the first and most causal problem was the disintegration of what had been a functional offensive line.

Darrisaw, playing after escaping the concussion protocol, did not play after halftime because of another concussion.

Analyzing individual offensive linemen is tricky, unless you know which players had which assignments on which plays.

Assessing unit-wide blame is easy. The Vikings couldn't protect Cousins, and without protection, the Vikings ceased to function as a professional football team.

They couldn't create first downs, which meant that their defense wore down against the physical Cowboys offense.

They couldn't give Cousins enough time to maximize the Vikings' strength: receivers who can make plays downfield. Cousins started the game chucking and ducking, and graduated to flinging and flinching.

The Cowboys exposed the soft underbelly of the Vikings, and it turned out to be the guys with the soft underbellies.

The Vikings are 8-2 and hold what appears to be a 30-game lead in the NFC North. One loss would not be cause for panic, if the loss did not reveal a weakness over which upcoming opponents will drool.

The Vikings' first loss of the season was to Philadelphia, which, entering Sunday's games, ranked fourth in the league in sacks per game.

The Cowboys ranked first, and they treated the Vikings offensive line like turnstiles greased with bacon fat. The Patriots, who play at U.S. Bank Stadium on Thursday, rank second. The Jets, who visit on Dec. 4, rank 10th.

In a copycat league, the Vikings just became Xerox machines, printing copies of their own weaknesses.

Never mistaken for five blocks of granite, the offensive line looked like the five pylons at a teenager's driving test. When they weren't easily avoided, they were crushed.

By the third quarter, the home fans were booing, and CBS was cutting away to Bengals-Steelers or Bud Grant's latest garage sale.

It's a shame when the Vikings can't stay close enough for their fans to complain about officiating or announcing bias.

"This is not going to be the last time we have to respond after an emotional win and come back and play the next week," coach Kevin O'Connell said. "We've got to coach better and play better. This is a huge opportunity for our team to really look inward.

"We expect in these tough times to really only be able to rely on our locker room, our players and our coaches, and we'll be right back here in four days to get this taste out of our mouths."

Nothing burgers tend to stick to the teeth.