Adrian Peterson
c/o New Orleans Saints
5800 Airline Drive
Metairie, LA 70003
Dear Adrian:
We are only 18 days from your scheduled return to Minneapolis as part of a running back rotation for the New Orleans Saints, and it's my duty to inform you the largest share of the Minnesota sports media and Vikings fandom are extremely excited not to have you here anymore.
The crowd that fills The Zygi on opening night might be willing to offer applause if and when you appear on the field, but you should know any such greeting will be a display of mass hypocrisy.
As it turns out, you were largely a detriment to the Vikings through the decade of employment here, and we're not talking about the seasons missed: one game played in 2014 when the child abuse case surfaced, and in 2016, when a knee injury and then a season gone awry limited you to three games.