Finding your groove in retirement

For many people, happiness is … retirement.

But what that means varies from person to person. Some people savor every minute of their retirement, while others fret over what to do with their newfound time or worry about money.

Yet studies show that older adults are happier than middle-age and younger people.

Retirement can be the best time of life partly because “people have more freedom of choice — they can decide how they use their time and energy,” said Kate Schaefers, a psychologist and director of the University of Minnesota’s Osher Lifelong Learning Institute (OLLI). “Retirement often is a reset … slowing down and enjoying life more.”

“[Retirement] is very happy, but it’s a different happy,” said Leanne Loren, 66, of Plymouth who travels, exercises, volunteers and gardens since retiring from her Ameriprise project management job in 2018. “It’s a different stage of my life. This is just my schedule and I can manage it and rearrange it.”

Like Loren, many people don’t think about retirement as their parents did: They simply see it as another life phase.

More people are retiring earlier — as early as in their 50s. Seventy percent of retirees report retiring earlier than age 65, with a median retirement age of 62, according to the 2024 Retirement Confidence Survey by the Employee Benefit Research Institute.

People also are living longer, healthier lives, which changes what retirement looks like. Some people may need a bridge job until Medicare kicks in at age 65; others may travel nonstop.

It’s about reshaping your identity in this new phase of life, said Phyllis Moen, a sociology professor emeritus at the University of Minnesota and Cornell University who coined the term “encore life stage” — the years between career-building and child-raising and old age. Her book, “Encore Adulthood: Boomers on the Edge of Risk, Renewal, and Purpose,” addresses the challenges people face transitioning into retirement.

“Individuals have to improvise at this encore stage; there are no clear paths,” Moen said. “This new life stage is filled with uncertainty, but it’s also rife with possibilities.”

Expectations don’t always match reality. “People have talked about how things can be different from what they’ve expected and even weird,” said Karen Carr, a certified professional retirement coach who owns Revitalize Life Coaching in Minneapolis.

A survey this year by financial giant MassMutual found that the 67% of Americans who are happier in retirement are more likely to be socially active, including spending time with family and friends (76%), exercising (70%), pursuing hobbies (63%) and traveling (62%).

Experts advise following these five steps to enhance retirement.

Meaningful relationships, including romantic partnerships, are the key to healthy aging, according to a seminal Harvard University study. They’re more important than money, fame or anything to achieve happiness, health and a long life, per the ongoing 86-year study.

A study co-authored by Moen found that couples age 50 to 79 were happier and less stressed when spending time together than apart. And we know loneliness and social isolation can be harmful: Social engagement is important for brain and physical health.

For many couples, it’s a balancing act. “Before one or both people were working and now they’re looking at each other across the kitchen table,” Moen said. “They have to rethink how they spend time together and apart.”

Husband-and-wife Dennis and Mickey Chick of Lakeville both retired in 2018. “We have similar interests, which really is helpful in retirement,” Dennis Chick, 71, said. “We like to do things together.”

Retirees may need to forge new relationships or rekindle old ones as work-based relationships disappear or their interests change, experts say. But the older you get, the harder it is to make friends partly because you’re not active in the environments to meet people, such as school and work. It comes down to finding places to connect with people.

Community and senior centers offer many free or low-cost programs and activities for older adults. At the Plymouth Community Center, free activities include monthly movie matinees. Other programs like book, choral and travel clubs carry an annual membership fee of $15 to $35 and some workshops cost $12, said Meghan Constantini, the recreation 55+ programs supervisor for Plymouth Parks and Recreation Department. Trips, including a Mississippi River cruise or a visit to Split Rock Lighthouse in Two Harbors, sell out in the summer, with participants ranging in age from younger than 55 to 100, she said.

Another important step to better quality of retirement life is finding a sense of purpose and belonging to replace work-related accomplishments. This may require some experimentation over time.

“The concept of finding a greater purpose can feel elitist for many people, but it can be as simple as coloring with your grandchild or spending time in your garden,” Schaefers said. “It could be time spent making your life and your family’s life stronger, not changing the world.”

Bill Lundberg of Plymouth retired at 56 after 34 years of teaching. “I didn’t realize how much I would miss it,” said the now 77-year-old. He filled the void, in part, by volunteering at Richardson Nature Center in Bloomington.

Finding a passion and others who share it is a way to form new connections.

Ruth Tongen, a certified professional retirement coach for 20 years in Edina, advises: “You need to figure out what really matters to you. Central to how to live the good life is knowing how to shift from external requirements of what your life is to figuring out your internal agenda.”

Carr suggests making a list of up to 50 things you might be interested in and start exploring them. “You have to be open to new things,” she said.

For 78-year-old Tony Anthonisen, there’s nothing he would rather do than play the ukulele.

“This is just wonderful,” said the Richfield resident, who retired in May as an Apple Store trainer and now leads various 55-plus ukulele clubs across the Twin Cities.

Research, including by the National Institute on Aging, shows that participating in the arts, including playing music, singing and dancing, helps build a sense of achievement and community belonging.

Staying physically active can improve cognitive and mental health.

Opportunities abound to enroll in gyms, join sports clubs or simply take a stroll. The Plymouth Community Center boasts an indoor walking track and a cycling group that’s grown from 80 to 123 members over the past two years.

“It’s a very positive group of people, friendly and outgoing,” said Lundberg, a Plymouth cycling club member who leads rides across the Twin Cities. “We’re welcoming to new members.”

Mental stimulation is one of AARP’s six pillars of brain health, which are backed by the Global Council on Brain Health.

It may be as simple as solving a daily puzzle, but others may want more formal learning, Schaefers said. The U’s OLLI offers hundreds of courses, including some related to the retirement transition, as well as clubs and volunteer opportunities for people age 50-plus for a $300 annual membership.

Since retiring, Loren keeps her brain active by volunteering, including creating a database of every single asset within the Plymouth park system and teaching herself Spanish online and through a library-based Spanish club. “I have so many communities,” she said. “I’m stimulated and I learn from them.”

Retirement is not a one-size-fits-all experience. Experts advise being flexible and open to experimentation.

“When you look at retirement, there probably are more changes than at any other time of our life,” retirement coach Tongen said. “Be clear about what your inner needs are, and it can be a really rich time of life.”