I remember when I was a kid and learned that the universe was expanding and therefore had no edges. I could not wrap my arms around the unanswerable question of what was beyond the universe.
Our clients often ask us an unanswerable question: How much should we be giving to charity? So I'll start with the unanswerable and move to two more easily addressed charitable questions: To whom should we give and how should we do it?
How much you give to charity ultimately comes down to motives. There are basically five overlapping reasons why we give our hard-earned money to others. Four of them sound a bit crass, but don't judge them, just explore them.
We may give because we feel guilty about what we have. I see this most often with clients who are conflicted about money and don't want it to be as important to them as it appears to be. The problem with giving out of guilt is you can't completely ignore those feelings, and can never give enough to assuage them. Instead, be more intentional with your purchases as well as your giving to fully appreciate your money choices.
We may give out of obligation. A friend is involved with a charity and asks us to support it. A quid pro quo results and we expect them to support our cause. Think of this inevitable reciprocity when you engage others with your causes.
We may give to build our legacy. But a legacy is often how others remember you based on who they are, not on who you are. Your actions will create a memory, and giving is just one of the many actions you take in your lifetime.
We may give for positional reasons. Giving can get us invited to things and seemingly improve our status. In this situation, giving is transactional, but it certainly may give us what we think we want.
The last reason we give is because we want to have an impact and feel a responsibility to not only provide our time and talents to causes, but also some of our treasure. Giving is aligned with our values and makes us feel like we are meaningfully contributing.